Thursday, 14 June 2018

What does it mean to connect? Tell me when you figure it out.



'I am human and I need to be loved, just like everybody else does.'

So London is a funny place.

We spend our whole lives trying to connect.

Whether that connection is to our goals, to our definition of success, to our friends, families or romantic partnerships. We are all trying to connect, to attach to something. To belong. To have ties to something or someone we can be-long with.

Actually in psychiatry / psychology, if a tiny human doesn’t form an attachment with those who raise them, they are in for a little bit of trouble.

I must tell you, moving to the other side of the world is very refreshing. Starting again, seeing the world like a baby, but also effort is required to make new attachments.

I don’t know about you, I am always looking for connection. Whether it’s the guy in the dairy, my managers, new cool friends or my hairdresser.

A bit like this (you'd be surprised how many memes on the web cover this):
I look at the people I interact with in the eye and I am always up for a chat. With most.
I’m trying to crack this London egg. And I am, cracking these bastards one at a time. Sounds very psychopathic, lol. Let’s call it getting people to open up, haha.

There are people in my new job who are fond of me, my new housemate is fond of me, my AirBnB hosts have been fond of me.

Or is it I who is fond of them? I’m not always great at telling the difference.

There’s been a few hugs (platonic!) let’s just put it that way.

The point of this post is that mostly it’s been harder to crack that London egg.
So many grumpy people here. And who can blame them? This city is huge, it’s more than rough for more than a few people.

So very grateful it is not rough, on the scale of things, for me.

The fact that I have time to blog and moan about First World Problems is testament to this.

But on the street, in the dairy and crowded spaces…. You think going ten floors underground in a packed tube for over thirty minutes is natural for human beings?! Probably not. Have you heard about black snot? Let’s not go there.

There is this slightly mean culture in the politest city on earth. Like when no one cares how they act when no one’s looking. No social graces to honour. I know this happens everywhere, but those people who take two seats (one for each butt cheek and maybe a third for their bag) on public transport, for example.

A work culture where people would rather please you at the time than honour what they promise you.

Disclaimer: I do not have experience of this in my current workplace (yet). This is the word of other expats.

For me, the proof is in the pudding. Judge people by what they do, not just by what they say.
Again, back to project management, a healthy project should be very action-oriented. With a plan.

If you have a dream, always follow with the word plan.

Don’t be fooled by my travels, I may be living a dream, but are dreams always sensible?

If I travel, it’s harder, yet more fulfilling, to be in a new city and have all this reconfiguration to do. 

Many people who I have managed to connect with have said ‘wow I could never do that, travel alone.’ As if I’m being brave or something.

I’m not brave I’m just curious.

You’ll have to excuse these monologues. Maybe this post is dreary, but the experience I am having is one of feeling like I am on to something very good.

Thank you for reading.



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