It wouldn't be a travel story without a scam...

14.05.18

This is me having the time of my life smiling like an eejit, the happy face of the freshly scammed and her scammers. 

One hour after this photo I was screaming down the phone at the driver and guide I had hired for three days, after it dawned on me to do some research... a little late but I got there in the end. I'm a slow learner. but if I really was slow, at least I wouldn't be aware I was slow? I'm trying to redeem myself here.

Let's back track a little. I went to the beautiful, the spectacular Amer (or Amber) Fort set in Amer, old Jaipur. It's now a village and popular spot for tourists, in fact, I ran into a couple of Cabin Crew from my flight to Jaipur. They remembered me, but something tells me they will remember me more after they get the complaint about their flight (First world problems). 

Anyway so Amer Fort is over 1,000 years old and was the home to the Rajput Maharajas. It is a UNESCO World Heritage Site and very well-preserved. It took me over two hours to explore it. I was able to forget my jet lag, the heat, lack of sleep and let her rich history seep into my bones. My guide was actually excellent. This is why he is good at scamming people. Even though he asked me why I wasn't married several times he was excellent at showing me around. 

Every now and again he mentioned a palm reader down the road who reads for free "no obligation to buy Mam!" Sigh. I didn't actually want my palm read, if you can recall my earlier post saying some things are better left as a surprise. After a spectacular tour and many, many photos we headed to an art gallery with modern Rajasthani paintings. They were actually unreal. At least with art I not only know an original when I see it, but a good one at that. I wasn't expecting to nor do I have the space in my luggage, but I scored an amazing piece that I know will be with me for years to come. Unfortunately this photo is a copy of the copy as it's all rolled up and safe now:

Deepak Kumar

See how the painting is a modern interpretation of Amer and portrays elements of the fort:

Someone from Google who was better at taking pictures than me

See how the goat sits peering at me like he's never seen an Albino Kiwi before:

Amer Fort Goat captured by Albino Kiwi

So as Sunil was slowly working his scamagic on me he of course saw that I purchased a painting that was the cost of probably two month's wages for him. To be fair, I felt terrible, but we all do what we have to do I suppose. 

On we drove to National Handloom Village Corporation. I never actually asked to go there or agreed to but I was so caught up in my lovely afternoon, my lovely guide, my lovely art and after several hours my guard was down. What harm could a palm reading do? And why are they reading palms at a textile/gemstone company? 

They showed me their elaborate "authentic" cloth dying methods on scrap pieces of fabrics and explained how all the gems were made, using other authentic stones, though not precious ones - just moonstone and rose quartz. I am certain this part was actually authentic. It was such an elaborate, tried and tested formula they had going on. 'See, here's how we make it, therefore the things in the shop are what we made also.' Then after twenty minutes of awkwardly going 'mmm, how nice' to badly made scarves, saris and cloths that were so obviously not silk (also ew - did you know silk is made from an insect?) I was taken into... the Gemstone Room. 

Can I just say that no mangos had materialised at this point, and it is mango season, and I had asked several times to my driver, yet not ever asked to come to this kangaroo circus?

But then my palm was read. One guy did the talking, the other was his "Guru," who actually turned out to be his uncle. 

That's when it got really weird. He knew so many things about me, things he couldn't possibly know - the date I moved to Sydney ten years ago (yes I know I posted that several days ago but this site is not linked to any of my personal accounts), my relationship history, my diet, my health, my habits, my involvement in politics (although perhaps they could have stalked my social media), any way it was all a lot of spot on information and as I said, my guard was down.

Long story short they sold me a fake topaz to "balance my chakras" and said that it would change my life. I handed over $152 AUD for what was probably a piece of glass, haggled down from the $430 AUD they originally tried to scam me for. 

By the way, the reviews of this place are all here, among many others. 

Afterward they invited me for lunch, which was actually delicious and my stomach is totally fine 48 hours later as I write this. They also invited me to a huge village party that evening. All credit to my driver, he told me it was a baaad idea, "because of the food." Yeah right. But right on the bad idea.

Having had a mind blowing experience thus far (such was the scam's power), I burst into tears when the truth was discovered. I hardly ever yell at people. I had been so careful choosing a driver via recommendation of a friend of 17 years - but the original driver was off having eye surgery. I went to town. I believe the words used were 'I trusted you!' 'How dare you?' 'You were supposed to look after me!' 'Do you think I'm fucking stupid?!' Oh dear. 

Anyway after the screaming match they drove around to my hotel and provided me a refund under the watchful eyes of concierge and my eyes on my internet banking. Fair play to them. I however have lost naiviety, a little optimism, a little credit card fees, and a lot of trust for the people here. I still paid my driver for the first day, I know he really needs it, he drove me around all day and his job was to literally drive me around. To scams. Oh did I say it again? You're damn right I said it again!

This isn't the first time I've been scammed (my entire holiday savings on "coral" pendants at the age of 11 in Fiji) and I should have known better. 

Perhaps this was a lesson to protect me from future danger on this trip. I've been revealing no information about myself to anyone. I've been leaving the house with my head covered, eyes down Handmaid's Tale style. It works. I've been asked (by women, men are invisible to me here now - as far as I'm concerned) if I live here. I've been complimented too - I didn't understand the language but I understood what they were saying. So maybe a message from the universe, or maybe I'm just scam-tastically stupid. 

I'll be getting a job in the Secret Service any day now. LOL.

Either way I fired my driver and haven't had any trouble with Uber now - as long as I know, and Google knows, where I am going, I've been just fine.

I'm getting the holiday I really needed - isn't it exhausting dodging deception? 

I think so.